Had to laugh a little bit when my daughter (age 10) said that to me recently. Really?
I thought it had been pretty obvious that this was what our family had been dealing with through the last year. I thought it was pretty clear why I was undergoing Chemo for 3 days every other month. I thought...I thought.
Once I stopped 'thinking', it dawned on me that I never used the word 'cancer' in front of my kids. I said 'chemo' but not cancer. I spent so much time making sure they knew that the doctors took out the crap in my body and that the medicine (chemo) they were giving me was to make sure it never came back. I spent so much time making sure life was 'normal' for them and that I was sooooo strong.
When I referred to my chemo treatments or when I felt lousy, I said that I was 'sick' but going to get better real soon. I never really told them the honest to goodness truth.
I was trying to protect them from being scared. Was I successful? Would it really have harmed them to know the truth? How do you judge what a kid can digest for info...how much info is too much?
I don't think I would have handled it differently except maybe use the word 'cancer' at the beginning and then continue to emphasize that chemo will make sure it does not come back...will make you sick as a dog, but should help...
My kids did great through my ordeal. I hope they gained some strength from our journey and never have to experience it again. Perhaps I should have them both do an entry to give their perspective- I bet it would be fascinating.
Curious to see how others handled telling/dealing with their children through cancer...
I thought it had been pretty obvious that this was what our family had been dealing with through the last year. I thought it was pretty clear why I was undergoing Chemo for 3 days every other month. I thought...I thought.
Once I stopped 'thinking', it dawned on me that I never used the word 'cancer' in front of my kids. I said 'chemo' but not cancer. I spent so much time making sure they knew that the doctors took out the crap in my body and that the medicine (chemo) they were giving me was to make sure it never came back. I spent so much time making sure life was 'normal' for them and that I was sooooo strong.
When I referred to my chemo treatments or when I felt lousy, I said that I was 'sick' but going to get better real soon. I never really told them the honest to goodness truth.
I was trying to protect them from being scared. Was I successful? Would it really have harmed them to know the truth? How do you judge what a kid can digest for info...how much info is too much?
I don't think I would have handled it differently except maybe use the word 'cancer' at the beginning and then continue to emphasize that chemo will make sure it does not come back...will make you sick as a dog, but should help...
My kids did great through my ordeal. I hope they gained some strength from our journey and never have to experience it again. Perhaps I should have them both do an entry to give their perspective- I bet it would be fascinating.
Curious to see how others handled telling/dealing with their children through cancer...
RSS Feed